This World is Merciless
by SwordxPen
Summary: An AU of chapter 50 where Mikasa is fatally injured before thanking Eren for everything he has done for her. Eremika. Warning: Major Character Death.


**Summary: Somewhat au of chapter 50 where Mikasa gets fatally injured and tells Eren the "thank you" speech right before she dies because I like torturing myself.**

The pale fingers tightened harshly within his own hand, accompanied by the sudden hitch of her labored breathing. Her back arched for a moment as she gasped for air that didn't seem to meet her lungs before turning her head and releasing a racking cough into a supplied handkerchief. There was a flash of crimson and then once the coughing receded, the ruined piece of fabric was tossed over the edge of the wagon.

_"__Eren."_ The familiar tone was thick with drowsiness and confusion. _"Why are you crying?"_

He clutched her hand tightly to his chest as he watched her stir from unconsciousness, his form trembling slightly. The lie slipped from his mouth. "I'm not."

Steel eyes fluttered open just as the morning sun broke past the clouds. She blinked uncomprehendingly at the sudden brightness as the colors of dawn washed over her, illuminating her sleek hair in an outline of fire and glinting off the soft sheen of perspiration on her forehead. A faint furrow formed between her brow. "Why am I in a-"

"Oh." Mikasa's tone was soft, tainted with faint realization and a humorless laugh escaped her stained lips. She gazed sadly at the mixtures of reds, oranges, and pinks shining radiantly above. "I'm going to die, aren't I?"

_"__Don't say that!_"

His exclamation carried out over the pounding of hooves against the ground, echoing slightly and tinged with a harshness he hadn't meant. A cry sounded from their left, Armin crouched over the reins of his horse and shaking within his saddle. It was more than enough to answer her question.

Eren's tone became softer, thick with a suppressed emotion. "Don't say that. You're not going to die."

But her labored breathing was becoming too loud to his ears, and the frailness of her grip on his hand was too revealing. Another cough hacked through her and an unbidden memory flashed through his mind; one of a grotesque smile, a huge fist squeezing a struggling figure, the sure snap of bone echoing in his ears. _The blood._

"Eren." The gravity of her tone caught him from the flashback, and his eyes widened at the sight of her lips drawing into a small smile. "Listen. There is something I want to tell you…"

Her hand tightened around his and with a surge of new found strength, she pulled him closer, her stare resolute. "Thank you, for being together with me. Thank you, for teaching me how to live."

She paused for breath, a hint of color surfacing to her cheeks, then with her free hand, she tugged at the burgundy scarf around her neck. "Thank you, for wrapping this muffler on me."

"Stop." Eren whispered, his shoulders shaking. "Stop saying goodbye."

Her smile wavered, turning into something sadder perhaps, as she reached up and wiped away the trace of tears on his face before reaching once more to the scarf on her neck. She loosened the red fabric from it's place, wincing as she leaned forward.

"What are you-"

Mikasa looped the scarf around his neck twice, tucking the frayed ends into the bunch of fabric. The smell of fresh honeysuckle and lilac wafted over him, with the faint undertone of fresh earth and perspiration.

He gaped at her, his jaw unhinged as he struggled to find the words. "Mikasa, it's your-"

_"__It's warm, right?" _

And then they were ten years old, and she was there with long ruffled hair, a bruised cheek, and an unworn red scarf draped lazily over half of her face. _There's nowhere… for me to go home to._

"Mikasa," He choked, "I can't… we… we were suppose to go to the ocean. Me, you, and Armin. We were suppose to go _together_."

She smiled once again, but her eyes were glazed as she settled back down on the wagon. She looked up to the sky with an almost wondrous expression.

"We will…" And the words were slurred and unfocused. His breathing hitched as her eyes drooped.

"Mikasa, hey, don't-"

Before he could even finish speaking her eyes already had flown back open as another set of coughs racked through her system. But then it was so suddenly _wrong_ because the coughs deepened, becoming thicker and more guttural as if she were choking. No, because she _was_ choking.

_"__Mikasa!"_

His heart plummeted and adrenaline coursed through his veins as his hands gripped her forearms, rising her forward. He tilted her head down, urging her to breath as another cough shook her. And then finally, _finally_, the coughs subsided, her form growing still, and a sigh of relief slipped through his lips.

And that was when the world stopped.

Because it was too quiet, in the middle of the Scouting Legion with the thundering of galloping horses and creaking of the wagons, the absence of sound hit him first. No coughing, no labored breathing, no breathing at all.

And when he tilted her back, her head rolled like a rag doll's, her hair fanning out like a raven's wing before hanging limply and chin lulling upwards, her eyes glassy and empty. Her hand tumbled from her mouth, the palm pooled with red that seeped onto the wagon, and a beetle of the same color dribbled from the corner of her mouth and dripped onto his shirt. Then he heard someone screaming, an awful broken sound that stays in the air even after it has stopped and it took him a moment to realize it was him.

And the world only started again after it had crushed his body in with its merciless hold and sucking away all the beauty it had to offer.

**Have you ever written something where you don't like it, but sorta like it at the same time? This is one of those things and I'm not sure if I conveyed this as well as I hoped to, but I can always come back to revise. Any thoughts?**


End file.
